BBall in Honduras

Returning Catracho Report images






"¿Hay una cancha de baloncesto aqui?" That was one of the first questions I asked when I arrived in El Porvenir. I had to explain myself a few times, it turns out basketball or baloncesto, is more frequently called "basquet," and some people aren't even familiar with the sport. After correcting me [cough, cough], they would let me know that there are some courts around. After being misdirected and getting lost I discovered that there are a few, but they rarely have rims and are exclusively used for "futbolito." I eventually found a gym in San Pedro Sula; a forty five minute bus ride away. I don't recall exactly how I came upon "El Joyo", but I'm almost certain that someone on Honduras_Living let me know about it. Maybe it was off the FIBA site, I forgot. However I found it, I got the number to the San Pedro Sula league director. The league was in "off-season" mode so I practiced with his team, a team in the feminine league to be more precise. These girls can hoop though. It seriously took weeks before I could play ball for more than 20 minutes because of the heat, but more so the humidity. The humidity in SPS is intolerable! After becoming more familiar with the local players and gym schedule, I joined a team and began practicing for the upcoming season. I was going to play with INMUDE, was. I was the only player on my team to show for the first game of the season (and a few practice sessions). I arrived an hour early so I could shoot around and maybe meet some other players. I shot around, and shot around, until I realized that they weren't coming. By this time the clock was counting down from 10 minutes until I had to face defeat by forfeit. I spent a few of those minutes trying to talk the opposing team into a 5 on 1 game, they declined. The worse thing about being the only one shooting around on my half of the court is due to my per game scheme; I try to look like I don't play at all so I can catch people off guard when the game begins. They wouldn't even play a pick up game, probably because I was shooting around like Phillip Seymour Hoffman's character in Along Came Polly. Shouting like him while I brick also "Money!" "Let it rain!" The horn went off and I walked off the court with the head down, disgust on my face, jersey off and dragging behind me. Worst of all, everyone standing around was sure to think I was an idiot after that shooting display. Luckily, another group of guys was willing to play 3 on 3 and I had the opportunity to redeem myself. Needles to say, no one was trying to guard me because of my terrible shooting exhibition. I took advantage and wowed a few folks and even pulled out the around the back elbow pass. (Note to reader: you may have to look that up here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTVhQAbAYmI) Before I left I was asked if I would be interested in switching teams and I accepted the offer. That made me feel like a highly sought after free agent, of course, that wasn't really the case.

From the following week forward, I began playing with the Halcones.... from Puerto Cortes. Puerto Cortes is far from San Pedro Sula so our team didn't practice; we just showed up an played. We only one two games that whole season and one W came from a forfeit. We ended the season as the second worst team, the team I was to play with previously took the last place honors, whew! Me switching teams at the beginning of the season sparked a rivalry between Inmude and Halcones, that created a great atmosphere for the game we played against them. They were actually the only team we won against. The league was very competitive, up at the top of the rankings anyway. I wasn't the best player on my team, but I was the "X factor". I shut down every stellar player on opposing teams, even a few centers and forwards. The only problem was that no one else on my team would play defense. I sometimes had to guard multiple players at once. The opposition hated me, especially because I led the league in charges taken. They didn't have a stat column for that, but I'm sure I would have led the league if they tracked it. I have a good video of that too! The ref wasn't wearing his glasses so he missed the first call, he made it up on the following play. Some dude even called me Vlade Divac! As a Sacramento Kings fan, I took pride in that. The picture right before tip off is when I begin the trash talking; I remember telling that guy that he was going to suffer if he didn't eat a complete breakfast that morning. I also mentioned he was too small to match up against me. That's my favorite line to big fellas "you're too small dude. How does your coach expect you to guard me?" I haven't developed much of a Spanish basketball vocabulary since nothing translates directly. For instance; suicides are "parillas." Let's run some "grills." when I first heard that I looked around and asked if we were barbecuing. Fortunately my all-time favorite line does translate well: "Tu defensa es ofensiva" or "You're defense is offensive!" It takes people a minute before they catch onto that one. When I say it during games, opponents usually have a look on their face like they're trying to decipher the hieroglyfics.

I've only played once since relocating to Roatan, the court was actually being used for futbolito so I had to wait until they were done to shoot around. I heard about a court, or rim, somewhere in West End, but I haven't found it yet.